Wednesday, September 14, 2011

A record.

I have now attended more AA meetings this week than I have in the past month alone.  You may gather that it is because I am sharing a vacation rental with my actively alcoholic mother, but it's also because I have decided to throw myself into AA.  I got a temporary sponsor after four years of sobriety.  I need to get with the program, or continue to be frustrated, angry, lonely, and a wee bit masochistic. 

On the brightest note of the week:  Mom decided to head back home because she was bored, and presumably because she didn't want to be "discrete" about her drinking.  I have spent the last four nights attending meetings, holed up in my room, or sitting outside until it was time to sleep. 

So while Cam takes a rare morning nap, I am able to finally breathe a deep, calming breath and look forward to the rest of the day and evening.  As Mom pulled away, I felt a pang of guilt (hello co-dependence!), but that was tempered with the realization that the living room is not off limits to me at night. 

Viva la vacation!

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